Dating Without a Parachute

Have you ever dated a person who seemed too good to be true, from the very beginning? I don't mean just, that you cliqued. I mean, the level of attention this person pays to you and the level of attraction they have for you is so strong and the ways in which they exhibit it is so appropriate and perfect for your taste, that you just think, wow this person really likes me! And maybe at first, you're casual about it. You're like, yeah, I like them, they're cool. And then, the more cool things they say about how much they like you and how much you have in common and the more romantic innuendo. . .well, the more you start to get sucked in. I'm talking, the level of attention and lengths they'll go to to spend time with you. . .borders on psycho, but falls just short. . .and therein, in that magical space between psycho and disinterested, lies your new crush.

I should also add, the couple of times this has happened to me, there usually accompanied some obscenely lengthed phone calls, sometimes late at night and when the other person was drunk, some bordering on inappropriate declarations of amorous feelings, and hyperactive rushing behavior facilitating their seeing me again--incidentally, both were out of town guys, thereby making the facilitating seeing me again more of a chore, and the drunk dials less inappropriate, because of the impracticality of them actually being "booty" calls.

So, in one of these situations. . .after meeting me once, kissing me when drunk, sending me flowers the next week, calling me every few days for a few weeks, and talking to me for hours +, telling me about a couple other girls he was dating, but that he really just wished I lived closer cause he was far more interested in me, and then, facilitating the buying of a PLANE TICKET for me to come out to New Orleans and visit him over Xmas, Weird Al Psychotic, we'll call him, calls me up one day, tells me he doesn't think it's such a good idea anymore and proceeds to act like I'm the one who's getting a little too into it. What?! Ok, I'm sorry, you're right, I shouldn't have jumped to the conclusion that you were really diggin' me just cause you bought me a plane ticket, my bad. Come to find out, things had progressed a little faster with one of the other girls than he thought they would. When they broke up a few months later, he was right back to calling me again. By that time, I knew the guy was an idiot.

Well, I may be in a similar situation now. I don't want to call a spade a spade yet, because object o' my affection assures me that he's not trying to bow out of dating me, he's just got some stuff going on that he needs to deal with. I told him, "Listen, I've had guys do this before, be completely into me, driving the action, and then all of a sudden, when I start to reciprocate, they pull the emergency break." "No, no, that's not what I'm doing, I promise, just trust me, just give me some time to think through some stuff. I'll tell you, I promise, I just need to get it straight in my head first. We'll talk about it later." I want to trust him. I do. I told him, "Give me a reason to trust you, and I will. Back up what you're saying and show me that I can believe the things you say, and I will. But I'm not feeling good about this right now." He kept reassuring me and wouldn't get off the phone with me until I said I was ok with it. I mean, if the guy wanted to blow me off, well, I got 50 ways you can do it: don't ever call me again, tell me "you're not ready," "you're seeing someone else," "we're not on a same page. . ." I essentially brought up several of these points and gave him several "outs," and he didn't take any. (He affirmatively disclaimed that he was seeing anyone else.) He never bit on one of them. He just said, "Give me some time, it's going to be fine. Just let me work through some stuff. I can't tell you what I haven't figured out yet." Again, he lives a couple hours away, so there's not pressure to see me again until we're able to work it out with our schedules (which are both conveniently booked for the weekend), so. . .

What do you guys think? Is this guy full of shit?

Last week, we talked on the phone all the time and we had fun on our date. . .we were really cliquing really well, and he was saying some bordering on inappropriately amorous things to me. I want to write him off. . .but I sort of don't think it's time. I know that I can't predict, and neither can you all, so screw the disclaimers. . .just tell me what you think.