Things I would not do if I were not sitting alone at my desk
1) Eat my salad in so few gulps that lettuce protrudes, scavenger-like, from my mouth in between hurried bites.
2) When done, use my finger to lick parmesan cheese off the side of the salad bowl where it is pasted by salad dressing.
3) Floss
4) Surf for Porn (ha ha, just kidding. . .or not).
5) Read the People Magazine I just bought at CVS to hear America sound off on the shocking and distasteful reality show "The Swan". . .to see if I want to Tivo it next season.
6) Sit and pontificate about why I never go in the CVS on Waters because each visit inspires in me a dramatic urge to throw my money on the counter (for the inevitable one or two items I wish to purchase) and barrel out of the store, so as not to get caught in the lazy, lazy, slow, ridiculous time and intelligence warp that is the Waters Ave. CVS.